Tomorrow I'm gone. Boring post about packing.

Today I'm panicking and failing to pack.

I did get my conference paper into multiple forms, including multi-formatting the power point presentation. Not that I'm paranoid....
I also bought myself a copy of The God Delusion to read on the plane. Which now strikes me as a bit of a waste, as I've still not read the copy of The Selfish Gene I got a few years back. I could have saved myself so money. Oh, well.

I have too much luggage. I'm braving going without my sleeping bag, and it is irksomely bulky. I think I will try and fit my also irksomely bulky jacket in somewhere/somehow as I think I may end up needing it. If everything goes to poo, I'll have my visa (which the bank teller assures me should work fine over there).

Anyway, I have panicking to get back to. Panic first, pack later....

As things go

People having been asking to see the stupid hair. So here it is. As you can see, it has a stupid amount of fringe and sticks up funny. Not the haircut I wanted (which was the one I get every time, with varying degrees of success).


In response to my homo-marriage plan I received the following advice:
"Yes never get married, to anyone, without checking how to get unmarried and what it will cost you. So speaketh she with the law degree. Although that should in no way be interpreted as legal advice as I don't have a practising certificate or, more importantly, any liability insurance :-)"
I guess I will have to think about homo-annulment, or just come up with a new running gag for this thing.

Roger Hall thinks I'm funny.

I think my conference paper is as ready as it will ever be. I have given it to my supervisor who will email me over the weekend if there is anything major to sort.

Otherwise I'm just stressing and failing to sort accommodation in Toronto. I have now, at least, sort getting from Vancouver to Campbell River.

Oh, yes. I also have clothes sorted for my presentation.
Alana, my Sugar-Mama, took me out and dressed me. She got me a stupidly expensive shirt which makes me look skinnier than I am, and a belt that draws attention to places I'd never feel comfortable drawing attention to but which she was very keen on. She also heavily subsidised a very expensive pair of jeans. They are nice, I look forward to my presentation being over so I can live in them until they die.
Alana is very good to me, I should smuggle her as my second piece of luggage. Asians are tiny and weight nothing.

Itinerary

Okay, I thought I should give people a heads up of when I was going to be where. So they could get out of dodge and avoid me more easily.

Tuesday May 8th. I will be arriving at San Fran in the morning, while at the same time still be packing frantically in Dunedin (where I don't leave till after lunch). The wonders of time travel, thrown in for free with my flights. That evening I fly both from Auckland to San Fran, and frm San Fran to Chicago.

Wednesday May 9th. I leave Chicago not long after arriving, and get to Kalamazoo in time for breakfast. I have a room from noon onward. For the next few days I conference.

Saturday May 12th. I present the yet uncompleted paper on Gawain to a hopefully not too large or mean audience. That night I get trolleyed in front of many academics - whom will hopefully all be too drunk to notice the funny antipodean retard.

Sunday May 13th. Conference ends about lunch. In the evening I board a Greyhound for Toronto. The aim is to sleep on the bus.

Monday May 14th. Arrive in Toronto at 6:30 in the morning and have absolutely nothing sorted, not even accommodation. May go to Niagara for the day. Or homo-marry a random. Will probably Youth Hostel for the night - I should really sort that.

Tuesday May 15th. Leave Toronto mid-afternoon for Vancouver. Will spend about three times as long in the plane as will have passed in the outside world. Again with the time travel. once in Vancouver, will climb on a boat to go stalk Elvis Costello in Nanaimo. Eventually find my family.

No plans for the following two weeks as I'm expecting family will have made plans for me.

Wednesday? May 30th. Get back to Vancouver, climb on a plane for home.

Thursday May 31st. Will not exist, Gods will steal this day from me in some sort of divine punishment for my whole time travelling gig weeks earlier. I shall feel robbed.

1 June. Wellington. Will visit there, staying with ex-fiancée and her current fiancé-wot-she-is-actually-marrying for a few days (I got those the right way around, right? Stupid frog-spelling).
Then head south, visit Christchurch for a day or two depending on if anyone will house me, then return home to see how much everyone has entirely failed to miss me.

Still too many preparations

I sorted making duplicate copies of much of my paperwork today - just in case things so horribly wrong. My aunt's paranoia is rubbing off on me.
I also got a haircut as to not look like a crazy person when I present. I don't like it, I think it looks stupid, but the girls from my office all seem to think it is good. Girls do have infinitely more knowledge of these things.

I still haven't sorted my trip to Niagara, or my accommodation in Toronto - but I'm assuming Youth Hostels oughtn't be too complicated. And who know, I may change plans by then. I could get homo-married on my one day in Toronto and stay at my new husbands place, it would make for an hilarious anecdote to post on this thing - having got homo-married just coz I was in Canada where it is all legal-like.

I also have to finish writing my paper - which I'll probably post on here a day or two after I've presented it. Or when I get the chance.